It can be very overwhelming to go through a breakup, especially a rough one. Not only are we losing someone we care about, but in addition to that we may also be losing a part of our routines, an emotional outlet, a silly friend to share experiences with, or anything else. Break ups are completely natural and a part of growing (corny I know). So don’t fret if you’re having trouble moving on, it’s absolutely normal!
Emotional loss can take a toll on our bodies, which makes this is the most important time to take care of yourself (alongside basically every other day). According to Time magazine, researchers have discovered that emotional pain after a breakup actually lights up the same areas of the brain lit during physical pain. How crazy is that though..
From 7 Phrases That Will Help You Get Over a Breakup to 22 Ways to Get Over a Breakup Like a Grown Woman (or man) there’s many suggestions of how to move on after a sad break with your past babe. You may feel many psychological reactions such as emotions of anxiety, depression and loneliness, but on top of that you may also feel physical responses such as lethargy and physical illness. Breakups can be very overwhelming, but I promise you, you can happily move forward!
Let’s start with basics.
During a breakup, your brain is the first to react, and it does so by instating the process of grief. Grief can come during any kind of loss, which doesn’t dismiss the loss of a loved one – in the form of a breakup. According to multiple studies, there are four general types of reactions to grief: chronic, healed, delayed and resilient. So just remind yourself, it’s okay you’re feeling some type of way, it’s definitely normal! But how can you motivate yourself to feel better? They say ‘fake it till you make it’ and in the case of breakups, sometimes this deems true.
A few common remedies for a broken heart include the following:
1. Have faith in the methods you’ll use – in one study, researchers used a placebo method to influence people’s reactions to their breakups (and physical pain) more positively. They found that the simple thought of feeling better actually made them feel better!
2. Take charge of your life – start doing things you like: increase your hobbies, look for a new job, start volunteering at your favorite organization, go to the gym, take up the next project in school! Intentionally increase the things in your life that make you happy and keep you healthy.
3. Distract yourself – listen to music, surround yourself with family and friends, start that new show on Netflix that you’ve been dying to see but haven’t had the time to, go meditating or for a walk! There are many ways to keep your mind off of the negativity - find as much positivity as you can.
4. Listen to music - whether happy or sad, according to scientists, music is a good way to accept the feelings you are having and move forward.
5. Start getting active - as I mentioned earlier, emotional pain after a while can turn into physical pain (the brain areas are linked), and what better way to relieve yourself of that then to release natural endorphins throughout the body by working out! Attend a yoga class, go kickboxing, barre like a ballerina, there's many classes out there to get that Adrenalin pumping and the dopamine flowing through your mind and boosting your mood.
6. Cut off all contact – although almost last on the list, this is the most important method to make sure you’re staying accountable for. Block him/her if need be, delete their phone number, move all the pictures and memories somewhere else (preferably removing them completely). In moments of vulnerability it’s important that you’re making the choices.
7. Take your time – last, but not least, everyone goes through grief differently. A lot of blogger will have time frames, personally I don’t agree! Go at your own pace, but don’t dwell in the past for too long. The goal is to move forward!
So keep in mind, you’re going through something incredibly normal, but believe in the fact that you will come out stronger, wiser, and better for yourself.
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